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I've held a lot of jobs

Recently, when speaking with some friends I was made aware of my wide ranging part time jobs. Name it and I might have, probably did, work it. I thought dedicating a journal entry to stories that occurred might be of interest. so here it goes.

*Each entry will be given a rating so you can read at your discretion (mom).



Job: Borrowed Bucks Roadhouse, cocktail waitress.

Location: Grand Forks, ND 2010

Rating: R

I really needed money. I found the only bar in town that was hiring 'Borrowed Bucks Roadhouse' and yes it was that classy. Work attire consisted of jeans and one of the company shirts similar to that of an auto mechanic. When looking through a pile of shirts my manager looked me up and down and said 'Well you kinda have big tits so probably a medium'.

I lasted a month. My final straw was serving someone and then him telling me he had just gotten out of rehab for alcohol.


Job: Pairs Crepeire...I spun crepes.

Location: Boston, MA 2011

Rating: PG

Along with making crepes out the wazoo, the creperie also served smoothies. The Jimmy Carter was popular (a frozen yogurt, banana, PB situation). A body builder would come in most nights I was working. He was clearly taking steroids: losing his hair and moody. He would order a Jimmy Carter, with whey powder for extra protein, point to me and say ‘I want her to make it.’ Once served he would sit at the front booth, drink the whole thing in one long gulp, and leave. It was nasty.


Job: College bookstore clerk

Location: Grand Forks, ND 2005

Rating: R

A guy once asked me for the best book on how to please a woman because I looked like I had experience.


Job: Long term Substitute teacher

Location: Grand Forks, ND 2018

Rating: PG-13

As a note, substitute teaching is interesting. I enjoyed it, but there is a bit of a divide between those who work daily at the school and subs who are like a short story. Students and staff can build entire narratives of you based on what you wear, and how you treat the students over the course of a few minutes. Lets just say this story unintentionally earned me points with one of those groups.

I was hired as a long term sub for sixth grade art. I have experience teaching art to kids, but managing a classroom of pre teens had its learning curves. We got along well though. There isn't a curriculum to follow for art at this age, so I made it up as I went. When teaching art paint is always a demand no matter the age. I was incredibly nervous to have this group paint, the hour was cut short by the classroom being a 8 minute walk from the students previous class and again for the making it in time for the next one. This leaves around 15 minutes of active art making time in the hour when you consider instructions and clean up. As I was starting to pass out the yellow paint an entire bottle of yellow dropped on the floor, and without thought I just plainly said 'SHIT.'

Collective silence from a classroom of 11 year olds, followed by the class gangsta pointing to me and saying 'Miss DOUUUUUTHIT, you cursed!' and then uproar. It was a long day.

Immediately as I heard kids leaving the room when the bell rang the story was spreading loud and clear for all of the staff and students to hear.


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